Yesterday was the first time I shared something on this blog in almost three weeks.
Ordinarily I’d quickly put up a bunch of back-dated content to fill out the illusion that I’m publishing something here every day. But that’s not the truth. That’s not me. At least right now it’s not.
I’ve got nothing. I don’t know how long this will last. I don’t know if I should leave this thing alone for an extended period of time. I used to think that forcing myself to write something every day, no matter how small, was worth it. That I would always be able to tap into that piece of creativity and when I needed fuller, more complete sentences, the process would take care of itself. But lately I haven’t cared about any of this, and that bothers me.
I don’t know if this makes me a poor diabetes advocate or someone worth listening to in the future, but I’m here in this moment telling whoever decides to read this that I don’t know what I’m doing.
I know I’ve tossed around the “I don’t know what I’m doing” line many times before, often in a playful manner. But right now I’m really lost. I don’t know what to do with all of this.