Sleep Deprivation

I maintain that the benefits of the Dexcom Continuous Glucose Monitor System vastly outweigh the annoyances that creep up from time to time. And I have the data to prove it. Lab results over the past year have yielded A1c’s under 6.9. Which is nice. More importantly, I think the self-confidence in what I’m doing to manage this disease remains high despite the consistent inconsistency of diabetes. Of course, this doesn’t mean I’m adhering to the signs and signals all the time.

During the day things are pretty kosher. Highs happen, and are met with swift corrections. Lows, unfortunately happen as well, and are met with a piece of candy or something equally fast-acting. But this is during the day.

At night I continue to be rather delinquent in my responsibilities as a person with diabetes – mostly when it comes to correcting the highs. I had the smart idea to set the reminder frequency for high blood glucose readings to thirty (30) minutes. I give this reminder alarm a ton of credit in helping lower my A1c. But at night, not only does it squander its good faith, it’s downright annoying. I realize that I only have myself to blame but I’m all about deflecting responsibility right now. Please forgive me.

I don’t correct highs as diligently as I should. I don’t think that makes me a bad person with diabetes, but when it’s waking up more than one person at night it becomes a legitimate irresponsibility. I suppose there’s some kind of subliminal rationalization going on when it comes to ignoring the alarms. If I’m low, but stable, during the day the numbers will balance out, right?

This stuff doesn’t keep me up at night, but it probably should. The number of times I’ve acknowledge the high alert on my Dexcom but done nothing is embarrassing. Waking up after an extended bout of high blood glucose, despite the alarms makes me feel like I’m abusing the technology. Not using this thing to its fullest potential makes me question using it at all. Do I deserve to have this device if I’m not going to use it? Am I wrong to have this sense of entitlement. Do I sound like a spoiled child when I complain about something that is ultimately making me a healthier person?

Odd. These fleeting thoughts do a better job of keeping me up at night than the Dexcom alarms. I need to do something about that.

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