Do you remember a while back when I was really unhappy with life? I wasn’t exactly in the best place when I was dealing with those emotions, chief among them – being alone. It felt like everywhere I looked people were smiling and holding hands and generally happy with their lives and I felt left out. It sucked. My thoughts went from ‘when is it going to be my turn?’ to something closer to ‘aww forget it.’ I’m not sure if I could have been classified as depressed, but I certainly was not happy. My oh my, how the times have changed.
I wrote that rather sad piece in February of 2009 and pretty much carried on with my head in the sand for the rest of the year. Then one day in July I got a new twitter follower, and found out she had type 1 diabetes just like me, and she lived really close to me, and she was really, really cute. Which brings me to cupcakes.
If you recall, I had a few issues with that meetup in November that I wrote off (to you all) as nerves. Truthfully, I was nervous about meeting her. I didn’t know what to expect, but the mere whisper of a ‘what if’ in my head caused me to over-react, freak out, and want to curl up into a ball and hide. I still consider it a small miracle that I got on the Metro that afternoon. Thankfully I didn’t turn her off to the prospect of hanging out with me some time after our cupcake adventures and we decided on the day after Thanksgiving to meet up for lunch and a movie. Still a ball of nerves, I ate a turkey sandwich (yes, turkey the day after Thanksgiving) and struggled to make conversation as we walked to the theater to get tickets to ‘Where the Wild Things Are’. By the end of the night I finally opened up and we spent the walk home talking about diabetes. My diabetes, her diabetes, my issues with Lantus, the benefits of her CGM, and much more. That’s when the comfort really set in, I didn’t have to hide the third-wheel that is diabetes. There was no shame in breaking out my meter over the course of the day, there was no need to explain what I was doing or why, no need to explain a high or a low #bgnow, there was no fear of a low because I was with someone who knew exactly what I was going through and knew what to do without thinking if I needed help. In the end, I felt comfortable just being myself.
Soon after ‘Where the Wild Things Are’ we decided to meet up for lunch in the middle of the week. It was during our first lunchtime planning conversation that we both realized we worked literally around the corner from each other (#fate?). One of the few perks of my miserable commute each day was knowing that every Tuesday I would get to have lunch with her. With the exception of a funeral, a vacation, a holiday, and a really busy work day, we haven’t missed a Tuesday since we started that tradition. Tuesdays turned into Fridays. Fridays turned into weekends. Weekends turned into “you wanna help paint some walls in my new condo?”
There are plenty of other moments that make me smile as I look back on the past year: she was the person championing my joining the Dexcom revolution. She is the reason I saw Inception in IMAX opening weekend. We’ve had talks about all kinds of issues with Diabetes only to see them turn into blog posts the next day (regretfully without giving her credit). She is the one who reminded me that when I try new foods, “I don’t have to like it.” She is the reason I applied for a kick-ass job with the American Diabetes Association. Assuming she is patient with me, she will be the reason I learn how to drive stick shift. She is the reason I have a Droid. She is the reason I signed up for Tour de Cure. She is my Caprisun-straw-inserter when I’m low (just as I am for her). She is the reason I have a newfound appreciation for the Cookie Monster. She is the reason I smile day after day. And ultimately she is the reason that I am very, very happy.
Which brings me to an announcement…