On to the Next One

There’s always that one to two day respite after an endocrinologist appointment that I have come to adore. It’s not that I stop testing, it’s not that I freely and incorrectly bolus for my food. None of that. It’s more of a moment of relaxation. It’s a feeling that approaches care-free, but is still cognizant of the seriousness of this disease. So I might have had a milkshake with dinner one day. I might have and a few cookies before I went to bed. I might have had seconds. Not to say that a person with Diabetes can’t have those things, but the extra awesome treats usually find a way to bite me in the butt later on. But for those few days, I just roll with it.

It’s a shame I can’t keep that attitude for the rest of the run up to my next blood draw and endocrinologist appointment. Not that none of this matters, because testing before each meal is crucial to managing all of this. Not that I shouldn’t be concerned with how many carbs are in whatever I’m about to eat, because those numbers do matter. It’s just that when I’m in “game time mode”, I think I care a bit too much at times. I’ll overreact to a #bgnow that isn’t really that bad, but because I have high expectations for my management, temper tantrums are bound to happen. I wonder if it’s better to care too much than to not care enough. Is there a happy balance in the middle where someone can stay on top of their blood glucose without getting too upset? I’d like to find that place and live there for a while. Or forever.

With this latest A1c (6.5) I feel like this is a good opportunity to reengage some other important aspects of my management that I admittedly let slip as I took a few big leaps into the next chapter of my life. The first is exercise. It seems my enthusiasm for weight lifting comes in waves and right now it’s a low tide. But with my recent participation in the local Tour de Cure event, and lengthy bike path mere steps from my home, cycling is the natural next step (pedal? gear shift?) for me. I’m not sure if talking about riding a bike on a blog is terribly interesting, but I’m sure I’ll think of something.

The other aspect that needs an upgrade is my diet. Basically, I lack variety. I know it. You know it. The American people know it. I’m slowly working in a new food here and there, but I need to be more determined to try new foods. In talking about this with a friend, I came to realize that trying new food isn’t that difficult, besides “I don’t have to like it.” It’s taking me a long time come to that realization, and even then I still have a lot of apprehensions about simply sampling a new dish. It’s a real flaw of mine that I really want to remove. This change in particular won’t happen overnight. It probably won’t happen over the next few months. But I know that the only way to eat healthier (not going to say healthy, but healthier than I my current diet) is to start trying new foods. Foods with, you know, nutrients in them. I’m not talking about a food revolution, but having a vegetable or two with dinner shouldn’t be the end of the world. Easier typed than swallowed, I know. I’ll get there.

So as I continue to ponder over what to do about some aspects of my management, I have a decent plan on paper (or at least a post-it) for improving other parts. If I can keep this A1c thing steady while improving other improvable parts of my health, then that’s a plus. Right? Right!